The Metamorph

Progress lost

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Today we had a fun outing for work and I decided to take my camera with me. Didn’t get any decent shots because I’ve forgotten how to work a camera beyond pressing the button that makes the camera make the clicking noise and then having an image magically appear in the screen thingamy on the back. I consider it lucky that there were times I actually remembered to remove the lens cap before trying to take a pic. And then I got myself all in a panic because the shutter wouldn’t release, so I put the camera back in the car and gave it up for the day.

When I got home, I pulled out my D80 Field Guide and reminded myself how to change my White Balance, ISO, and Exposure. And it turns out there’s nothing wrong with the shutter. Trying to take a picture with the camera set to “A” or “M” will mess you up like that, especially when you’re meant to be in “P.”

So. There’s that.

I’m feeling a bit gross and lethargic and just in a funk today. I’m blaming it on hormones, being tired, and the weather. I would love nothing more than to spend the day curled up in bed, in my pajamas, with a book and some cookies, alternately reading and napping. However, it feels like it’s been a long freakin’ time since the kid and I got to do anything together, just mom and David doing something not involving cleaning the house, so out we’re going.

When I woke up this morning the sun was out and the skies were all blue, which was a nice change from all the rain and thunderstorms we’ve been having lately. I thought, “Hey, nice! Maybe I’ll grab my camera and we’ll go to the botanical gardens or something!” (YAY, I CAN HAZ CAMERA NOW, FINALLY!) But I’ve just come in from checking the mail and UGH. Gray and humid, hardly a patch of blue to be found. To the movies we will go, then.

Spritzed myself with a bit of perfume when I got dressed to help combat feeling gross. Apart from being my favorite perfume, Lolita Lempicka always makes me think of New York City. Maybe it’s because I bought it shortly before one of the trips David and I took there while we lived in Maryland, and a trip to NYC felt like an opportunity to be a little more adventurous and daring in more ways than one, so I wore my new perfume all over the city. Maybe it’s time to find something or some place new to explore.

Found a message in my voicemail from a photography place that I’ve never heard of telling me that my son’s senior portraits are scheduled for tomorrow. Um, excuse me, but how about you first ASK whether or not that’s convenient? Which, by the way, it isn’t, thank you very much. Can’t do it, have to reschedule. I’ll let you know. Also…what? Senior in high school? Hum. Sounds exciting, but I don’t know if I can permit that. All of a sudden it seems like there aren’t a whole lot of ”Mommy and David’s Day Out” days left.

It would be inaccurate to say I’m getting cranky in my old age; I’ve always been cranky. These days I’m much more likely to verbalize it to perfect strangers, though, and I don’t necessarily restrict the venting to the Internet anymore. I mean, like, I actually open my mouth and SAY things to people who piss me off. *GASP!* Well, not at work, but elsewhere. I just find myself having less and less patience for people who are disrespectful or downright rude, and instead of spending precious energy clamping my mouth shut and trying to communicate my displeasure telepathically, my annoyance makes itself HEARD. Prime example number one.

Example number two: El Fiance and I spent the night in a hotel recently for a Military event. Not only was the hotel full of Military folks and their families, but one or two young girls’ soccer teams as well. I got to the room myself at about 10:30pm and girls of all ages were running to and from the pool, the soda/snack machines, and each other’s rooms, one of which was next to mine. Packs of girls aren’t quiet, it’s just a fact. Doors were slamming, feet were thumping up and down the carpeted halls, voices were loudly calling to each other and echoing in the nearby stairwell without any adult supervision in sight. Me and my Demon of Speaking Up weren’t having it. I popped out into the hallway and quite firmly announced “Ladies, it’s late. People are trying to sleep, it’s time to quiet down.” I got a meek “Yes, ma’am,” said “Thank you,” and returned to my room. Demon of Speaking Up was all  kinds of gratified and smug: “See what happens when you say something? Shit gets DONE and you get to sleep.”

Example number three: Today at Walmart. I confess to becoming something of a Shopping Cart Nazi. No matter where you park at our Walmart, you don’t have to walk unspeakably far to put your cart away in a corral. So today I take my cart to the trunk of my car, unload contents into the trunk, and walk across the lane behind me to put the cart in the corral. What, 12 feet away, maybe 10? Took 30 seconds. I get back to my car and I’m about to get in when I notice that the people parked in front of me, who also just unloaded a cart, have parked said cart at the front bumper of my car. I didn’t even think about it. “REALLY? The cart thingy is RIGHT. THERE.” And yes, they heard me, because the dude gave me a look that plainly said “Uh…dur?” Excuse me, but have a little respect for other people’s property! The fact that YOUR car is a hunk of shit doesn’t mean you’re allowed to make MY car that way, lazy ass. I should have demanded the dude fork over his wallet as my fee for taking HIS cart over and putting it away right behind mine.

I’m just 35 years old. Imagine me at 80.

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